Cone of Silence

I recently viewed the movie, "Get Smart" and want to get one of those thingies that was like a cone of silence. I don't think that's what they called it but I still want one. The reason I want one? So I can let out the rabid thoughts in my head as they occur to me, no censoring, no being nice, just blurt it out. But I would appear nice because the person I didn't want to hear it though standing within earshot would not hear it. I'd need an improved version that was invisible and able to be connected to only one other individual of my choosing. I wouldn't want any snarky, rude thought that might cause laughter to go completely underground. As it stands now the thoughts occur to me and I stop them or sometimes I later relay them to GTC or another person but the delay lacks the punch of the original thought. I don't know why I need this because I do have a blog to vent upon. I guess the immediacy is appealing.

So tonight I come home from taking the kids to karate and roam through the house to put some things away. As I descend the stairs I see a big ass out the back window. See, a cone or some sort of censor might come in handy even as I type. Anyway, our neighbor behind us has taken our comment that she can use the trampoline "anytime" to mean you can use the trampoline "all the time." The disturbing thing about this is the entrance to the trampoline is facing the back of the house. Her daughter was on it and she was leaning into the entrance pushing down on the trampoline to bounce her daughter as her big butt was awkwardly jiggling to and fro. Lazy -- get on the damn thing. Your child is 20 months. But the visual is hard to shake - no pun intended. The thing was shaking it's way all around. To make matters worse it was dinner time. I did the only thing a forthright person could do -- I pulled the blinds shut. If I wanted to view that kind of spectacle I would rather it be of my choosing from late night HBO and preferably someone I do not know at a time when the kiddies were all safely elsewhere. If I had the cone I would have opened the window and shouted, "Get your FAT ASS off my property! I am trying to have a nice family dinner here!"

There are so many other instances where the cone would be of use. Had to get this one off of my mind.